21st Century Bogatyr: The Tropics of Planet Birobidzhan

by Zvi Baranoff

The streets of every neighborhood of New New York were raucous with the celebration of Purim throughout the night. The sounds of the drunken revelers were everywhere. The celebratory noise rippled through Tamar's window above the bakery until nearly dawn.

Tamar was content to be sober, by herself, and in her apartment. Tamar stayed at home, reading, drinking herbal tea, playing her fiddle, and resting. She went to bed early.

The whole next day the city seemed to be suffering from a collective hangover. The remains of the festivities littered the streets. Bits of clothing and gauze were everywhere.

Overnight, some alleyways had been turned into temporary improvised urinals. The smell of piss lingered. Some people fell asleep in doorways or on the sidewalk. A few were still sleeping in these odd places long into the day.

Businesses around the city opened late the day after the Purim festivities, or not at all. The bakery below Tamar's apartment opened late and closed early.

Tamar was grateful for the pleasant fragrance of breads and cakes baking. She had become accustomed to those smells and would certainly miss that when she moved. She was very glad for the platter of croissants that the baker's apprentice delivered to her that morning.

The following morning, Tamar rose very early. She packed her rucksack and took the time to tidy the apartment before leaving it for good. When the bakery opened its door, Tamar returned the apartment key to Miriam. The two women exchanged hugs. Tamar left with a few fresh baked rolls added to her rucksack and walked towards the docks.

Tamar's strolling was casual and pleasant. Tamar felt something akin to nostalgia as she walked past the various corners where she had played her violin, the Herbal Apothecary where she worked, the cafes that she had frequented and the yeshiva where Baruch and Shmuli studied.

Tamar arrived at the ferry station with time to spare. Tamar bought her ticket for the boat trip to Eilat and then ordered tea from the cafe. She sat at an outdoor table on the sidewalk adjacent to the docks. The tea was served shtetl style, in a glass with a sugar cube on the side.

The travel time by boat from New New York to Eilat is around three hours, depending on the weather and sea conditions. The sea is calm most of the time, making it generally a very pleasant trip.

New New York is semi tropical but as one heads south on the ferry into the true tropics, the transition becomes evident. Temperatures rise. The texture of the air changes. Colors become more vibrant. Along the way, traveling on the ferry, the warmth of New New York is replaced by the balminess of the Tropics.

The Tropics of Birobidzhan are sparsely populated. The Tropics consist of the small stadt - actually not much bigger than a shtetl - of Eilat and a smattering of very small and semi isolated coastal shtetls where Yidden scratch out a leben by fishing. One can travel between the various shtetls on a network of goat paths or by small boat.

There are no large fishing fleets to be found. There is little industry or commerce to speak of. The region has a small agricultural sector that specializes in growing etrogim, the citrus fruit that is used for Sukkos. Other than that, there are very few commercial farming endeavors. Most food is raised in family gardens. There is no mining and no manufacturing to speak of.

Eilat and its vicinity have some tourist draw. There are hotels and restaurants that cater primarily to visitors. Visitors come to the Tropics mainly in the winter. After Purim, travel to Eilat falls off. The ferry was not crowded at all and that was certainly the way Tamar preferred it.

Tamar stayed on the upper deck of the ferry for most of the trip. She had a fair degree of privacy and an incredible view. The sea was nearly without waves. The water was a beautiful aqua color.

A breeze blew through Tamar's unraveled hair. The sun was shining on her shoulders when she removed her shaw and on her legs when she adjusted the folds of her skirt and stretched out. Tamar soaked it all in.

The Tropics of Birobidzhan have far more Sephardic and Mizrahi influence than the rest of Planet Birobidzhan. This first becomes evident to visitors when eating in the local restaurants of Eilat. The food served there is spicier than what is found elsewhere on Planet Birobidzhan. There are also, one might note, some variants in the Sephardic approach to Kashrut laws and customs, particularly concerning Pesach.

Throughout the Tropics the mezuzah on the outer doors of most buildings is perpendicular rather than at an angle, which is the planetary norm. Most buildings in the Tropics, in addition to a mezuzah, display a hamsa to ward off evil. Additionally, the ceilings of porches are usually painted blue as this is believed to help protect a home from evil spirits.

There is a local accent in the Tropics of Birobidzhan with some unique pronunciation. In some cases, the accent is placed on a different syllable. In the Tropics, there is a tendency to sometimes use a "t" sound to replace the "s" or "sh" that is more common on the rest of Planet Birobidzhan. On the whole, however, the shprakh spoken there is not incredibly different from the shprakh of the rest of the planet.

There are quite a few Spanish and Arabic words that spice up the Yiddish spoken in the Tropics of Birobidzhan. At times, the use of one of these words denotes a very different meaning from the more common Yiddish words with the same definition.

If one is speaking about getting something done "tomorrow" one can say either morgan or mañana. If one is told morgan in the Tropics, then the speaker may actually mean tomorrow. If, however, one is told mañana it means that maybe tomorrow or the next day or maybe next week or perhaps not at all. The Tropics of Birobidzhan are called the Land of Mañana for good reason.

The ferry arrived in Eilat in the early afternoon. The city seemed sleepy, as if just waking from a nap.

Most businesses in the Tropics close mid day for an extended lunch and rest in the shade. The local term for this extended afternoon break is siesta. This derives from the Spanish word meaning a nap. Indeed, the arrival of the ferry from New New York coincides with the conclusion of the siesta.

The first thing Tamar did upon arrival was to rent a cozy room at a guest house. She left her rucksack and violin in her room and headed out to see Eilat unencumbered.

Tamar walked about, looking at the colorfully painted homes and the lush gardens accented with splendid tropical flowers. She ate a seafood meal in a quiet little restaurant. The dining room had windows that opened to the street and a ceiling fan that circulated the balmy air. She watched the sun set into the ocean sitting on the dock.

Tamar was enamored by theTropics.

This is not a Jewish story. It is, however, a story about Jews. One does not need to be Jewish to read this tale any more than one needs to be a Hobbit or an Elf to read Lord of the Rings.

This story is a work of fiction. The setting for this tale is in the distant future, on the far away Planet Birobidzhan. This planet was settled by Jewish exiles from Planet Earth.

The population of Planet Birobidzhan has been cut off from the Home Planet for a long time. They have developed their own unique culture, traditions and linguistics.

The language spoken on Planet Birobidzhan is primarily Yiddish. I have sprinkled a significant number of Yiddish words and phrases throughout the telling of the tale. I also refer to various Jewish religious and cultural touchstones.

To make this story more accessible, I have included a glossary of words and phrases in Yiddish and Hebrew that are used as well as some explanations of religious terms and holidays.

I hope that readers find this to be useful.

The link to the Glossary is here:

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/a-useful-guide-glossary-to-planet.html?m=1

פּלאַנעט ביראָבידזשאַן

Do you want to read more about Planet Birobidzhan? Here are all the installments so far, in the order that they were posted. Just click your way through the story!

1 On A Planet Safe for Yidden

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/on-planet-safe-for-yidden.html

2 Yenne Velt: A History of Planet Birobidzhan

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/yenne-velt-history-of-planet-birobidzhan.html

3 Another Globe, Perhaps?

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/another-globe-perhaps.html

4 Bereshis: The Transport & Transformation of the Founders

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/03/bereshis-transport-transformation-of.html

5 The Town of First Landing

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/03/the-town-of-first-landing.html

6 A Personal History of an Early Settler on Planet Birobidzhan

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/05/a-personal-history-of-early-settler-on.html