Thursday, December 15, 2022

Intergalactic Travel Can Not Be Done on the Cheap

 


by Zvi Baranoff 

The years had passed since the launching of the first satellite placed in rotation around Planet Birobidzhan. The satellite brought improvements to communications, worldwide radio reception, and also a steady passive income for Dovid and Der Profesor. It was not enough money, however, for all that they hoped to accomplish. 

The business of the satellite was fairly straightforward. There was certainly a fair degree of what could be understood as graft involved, or what is commonly called Aun Vas? on Planet Birobidzhan as was true of all enterprise. The ownership and management of the satellite was a partnership in the control of Dovid and Der Profesor. They raised the investment capital, managed the enterprise, and spent the profits as they saw fit without any oversight. 

Travel to the stars called for the much larger economic modeling of a corporation or more accurately a syndicate or a cabal, rather than a simple partnership. Massive amounts of capital were needed. There was no straightforward way to raise that kind of capital. 

The satellite helped spur a renewed curiosity in the possibility of intergalactic travel. Still, only a fraction of the population expressed any deep interest and fewer still were willing to put their tuches offen tish with actual gelt for such. We had lived on Planet Birobidzhan for many generations and we had acclimated to that world. Still, some Yidden began to step forward, or were drawn in, bringing their Shekels to the project. 

Investors introduced new complications as each had expectations that needed  consideration…or, at least placating. A Corporation requires a Board of Directors that nominally answers to investors that expect a return on their investments. 

Much of the technical aspects of the enterprise were essentially being guided by the mushrooms of Planet Birobidzhan. The mushrooms seemed to understand physics, biology, electronics, fuel systems and more. Even much of the social aspects were likely manipulated by those forces. The mushrooms played a direct role, for instance, in instigating Dovid's courtship of Rifka Leeba. 

What the mushrooms had no concept of is economics or financial matters. The mushrooms left such petty considerations to humanity. However, without funding, traveling through the stars could only be hallucinations or science fiction. Interstellar travel is very expensive. 

The unvarnished truth of the matter is that the likelihood of any financial return hovered somewhere close to nil. The successful profitability of even that tiniest fraction of a percentage within one's lifetime was even less likely. 

Dovid, Der Profesor and the small circle of trusted confidants learned to listen deeply and to tell potential investors exactly what they wanted to hear. All told, the co-conspirators became adept at the art of disinformation and boldface calculated lies to hoodwink investors. 

Hands down, investors believed that the greatest potential was to reconnect with the Home Planet. Some hoped for repatriation. Others envisioned development of trade between Planet Birobidzhan and Planet Earth. 

The consortium assured investors that such a strategic approach would lead to a healthy return on an investment. 

To be skeptical of successfully reconnecting with Planet Earth was certainly a reasonable outlook. Over two centuries had passed since communication with the Home Planet had been unceremoniously severed. 

All that the settlers at the time of the disconnect could do was to speculate about what went wrong. All of the guessing involved some level of catastrophic occurrence. Something horrible had surely happened but our ancestors could not fathom what occurred any better than Dovid and his associates could two centuries later. 

The consortium delved into an extensive profusion of overly optimistic speculation of snafus and foul ups that could have led to the severance from the Home Planet that fell short of catastrophic. Maybe, rather than a disaster, communication fell off because someone hadn't paid the phone bill or our brethren on the Home Planet had simply lost interest in extra planetary excursions. 

Perhaps, Dovid's band of fundraisers proposed, the Agency had simply gone bankrupt, the pyramid scheme collapsing on itself and there were no funds to even inform the settlers of Planet Birobidzhan. Perhaps Earth had forgotten about us and life on Planet Earth was thriving and we would be welcomed back with open arms. This is the sort of thing that was said to potential investors. 

Within the organization, and out of earshot of their marks, those sorts of investors were referred to as Lot's Wife.

Some Yidden hoped to make contact with other human settlement planets. The settling of Planet Birobidzhan did  not occur in a social void. Other exploration projects were also set in motion at that time.

It seemed plausible that some settlements on other planets were nearby - essentially in the same neighborhood. Investors held hope for trade. However, it certainly seemed unlikely that any other settlement in this particular quadrant would be an attractive trading partner. Likely, any parallel settlement would be in roughly the same condition as Planet Birobidzhan, with precious few opportunities to offer. 

Then, there were those that envisioned an expedition of discovery that would return wealth to Planet Birobidzhan. They were promised a wealth of discovery that would be relayed back to Planet Birobidzhan from the very inception of flight. 

Of course, none of the stories told to investors reflected the actual intentions of Dovid and his consortium as influenced by the mushrooms of Planet Birobidzhan. Their intention was resettlement for a small contingent of pioneers. They had no interest in Planet Earth and no concern for the interests of investors. 

When sufficient funding was available,  the consortium set out to acquire the Hatikvah. 

What could be more fitting than using the vehicle that began the Planet Birobidzhan settlement experiment in the first place, two centuries earlier? Of course, there were quite a few steps that would need to take place before that would be possible. 

After two centuries of sitting on the edge of the airport and serving as an apartment building, entertainment center and market, there were a lot of diverse interests that would need placating to simply acquire the Hatikvah, before the massive retrofit could even begin.

Many of the apartments were occupied by the families of the original Hatikvah passengers. There was a lot of emotional investment in a home where the family can trace ownership back over two hundred years. 

Apartment buildings needed to be built to resettle these families. Each family wanted a place just a little better than the abode they were giving up. They wanted a  better view, higher ceilings, more space and greater comforts. Each family also expected to be compensated as well for the trouble. 

The merchants that operated businesses in the Hatikvah each considered their stalls to be prime real estate. A shopping mall was built for those businesses. 

The original hydroponic growing facilities were still in operation, cared for by some of the descendents of the farmers that had arrived on the Hatikvah.  They too needed new facilities and compensation. 

Around twelve hundred Yidden boarded the Hatikvah on the Home Planet and traveled on that first ship to initiate the settlement of the world that became known as Planet Birobidzhan. 

That voyage took nearly eighteen years and transpired in living and breathing very real time and not the cryogenic deep sleep of all the following flights. 

The original Hatikvah was designed for one-way travel. The destination was programmed into the automated systems that piloted her through the vastness of galactic mileage transpired. 

The rekindled Hatikvah faced a different set of challenges and therefore required broader piloting options. On the flight from Earth, they knew where they were heading and had no perceived need for the propulsion rockets and fuel capacity for reentry to space. 

When leaving Planet Birobidzhan, on this flight those on board were quite uncertain as to where they were headed. They needed the security of being able to choose to leave any planet they landed on.

Because of the need for more equipment that would add weight and take up space, the repurposed Hatikvah would have far less passenger space. With significant reductions in personal space and common areas, they had to assume less people would be able to travel than on the original voyage. 

The corporation continued over these years to consolidate resources and to spend those Shekels retrofitting the ship. It was all a monumental task and very costly.

As this work was being done, a tight knit shadowy community of a few hundred pioneers was being formed, drawn together and empowered by semi-regular gatherings where the cultivated mushrooms of Planet Birobidzhan were consumed. 



This is not a Jewish story. It is, however, a story about Jews. One does not need to be Jewish to read this tale any more than one needs to be a Hobbit or an Elf to read Lord of the Rings. 


This story is a work of fiction. The setting for this tale is in the distant future, on the far away Planet Birobidzhan. This planet was settled by Jewish exiles from Planet Earth. 


The population of Planet Birobidzhan has been cut off from the Home Planet for a long  time. They have developed their own unique culture, traditions and linguistics. 


The language spoken on Planet Birobidzhan is primarily Yiddish. I have sprinkled a significant number of Yiddish words and phrases throughout the telling of the tale. I also refer to various Jewish religious and cultural touchstones. 


To make this story more accessible, I have included a glossary of words and phrases in Yiddish and Hebrew that are used as well as some explanations of religious terms and holidays. 


I hope that readers find  this to be useful.


The link to the Glossary is here:

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/a-useful-guide-glossary-to-planet.html?m=1


פּלאַנעט ביראָבידזשאַן


Do you want to read more about Planet Birobidzhan? Here are all the installments so far, in the order that they were posted. Just click your way through the story!


1 On A Planet Safe for Yidden

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/on-planet-safe-for-yidden.html

2 Yenne Velt: A History of Planet Birobidzhan

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/yenne-velt-history-of-planet-birobidzhan.html

3 Another Globe, Perhaps?

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/02/another-globe-perhaps.html

4 Bereshis: The Transport & Transformation of the Founders

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/03/bereshis-transport-transformation-of.html

5 The Town of First Landing

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/03/the-town-of-first-landing.html

6 A Personal History of an Early Settler on Planet Birobidzhan

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/05/a-personal-history-of-early-settler-on.html

7 Chickens, Jews Harps & Cronyism

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/07/cronyism.html

8 Dovid's Neshumeh

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/07/dovids-neshumeh.html

9 The Octogenarian and the Youngster

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/07/the-octogenarian-and-youngster.html

10 An Otherworldly Havdalah

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/08/an-otherworldly-havdalah.html

11 The Courtship & Marriage of Bathseba

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/08/the-courtship-marriage-of-bathseba.html

12 A Job, an Apartment & Two Honeymoons

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/08/a-job-apartment-two-honeymoons.html

13 The Pathway Into the Stars

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/08/the-pathway-into-stars.html


14 Abi Guzunt 

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/08/abi-guzunt.html


15 A Dozen or So…

http://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/10/a-dozen-or-so.html


16 Tamar's Sketchbook 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/11/tamars-sketchbook.html?m=1


17 An Apologetic Interlude in the Galactic Tale

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/11/an-apologetic-interlude-in-galactic-tale.html?m=1


18 Tamar's Mushrooms 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/11/tamars-mushrooms.html?m=1


19 Intergalactic Travel Can Not Be Done on the Cheap

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/12/intergalactic-travel-can-not-be-done-on.html?m=1


20 Unauthorized Fire on Planet Birobidzhan 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/12/unauthorized-fire-on-planet-birobidzhan.html?m=1


21 Tamar and the Klezmorim of Planet Birobidzhan

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/12/tamar-and-klezmorim-of-planet.html


22 Heresy, Flimflam and Death 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2022/12/heresy-flimflam-and-death.html?m=1


23 On a Distant Planet, An Apartment in the City by the Sea

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/on-distant-planet-apartment-in-city-by.html?m=1


24 The Girl with a Fiddle on Planet Birobidzhan 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/the-girl-with-fiddle-on-planet.html


25 Tamar and the Scholars of Planet Birobidzhan 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/tamar-and-scholars-of-planet-birobidzhan.html


26 The Tropics of Planet Birobidzhan 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/the-tropics-of-planet-birobidzhan.html


27 The Beaches and Coastal Shtetls of Planet Birobidzhan 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/the-beaches-and-coastal-shtetls-of.html


28 A Pre-launch Reunion 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/a-pre-launch-reunion.html


29 The Launch Was Imminent 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/the-launch-was-imminent.html


30 Liftoff Into the Unknown 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/liftoff-into-unknown.html


31 Across the Void, Down a Wormhole & Into the Snow

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/across-void-down-wormhole-into-snow.html


32 Flourishing on Planet Shney 

https://21stcenturybogatyr.blogspot.com/2023/01/flourishing-on-planet-shney.html


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